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Worry is the darkroom that develops our negatives
Psychology for Living
Gwen Randall-Young October 24, 2004
The other day when I was driving, a roadside sign
caught my eye. It said: “Worry is the darkroom that
develops our negatives.” Wow. What a powerful statement,
and how very true.
To worry means to feel anxious or uneasy. All worry
is a product of the mind. We can use our minds to
keep us in either a positive or a negative state.
When we begin to imagine negative things— about
how a situation will turn out, what people will
think of us, whether we will succeed—we put ourselves
into a state of fear. When we replay the same fear
thoughts over and over, they begin to take up permanent
residence in our minds. Before long, they take on
the aura of truth.
Isn’t this a little like a photographic negative
develops? At first the image is very faint, but
gradually it takes on a clear, bright focus. Now
imagine there are many aspects of life about which
one worries. Think of all of these negatives being
developed over time. Soon, our mind is cluttered
with pictures that do not make us very happy. Our
world may seem to be an unfriendly, inhospitable
place.
But wait, did this not all start with our imagining
negatives? Could we have made it otherwise? The
fact is that we are in control of our own minds,
and our minds control the reality in which we live.
We can choose how we look at things. We can choose
to focus on the good in ourselves, others and our
world. We can choose not to judge others, and not
to take offence.
We can do this even if we think we have been wronged.
Nothing can truly hurt us unless we allow it to
do so. If another person behaves badly towards us,
that is their issue, and we do not have to take
it on. We can refuse to get into a negative process
in response.
So if we find our minds wandering into negative
territory, it may be wise to remember that the negative,
in life as in photography, is not the true picture.
What is real and true is the positive.
Gwen Randall-Young is a author and
Chartered Psychologist in private practice. Her
books and tapes are available at www.gwen.ca or
gwendall@shaw.ca
Gwen Randall-Young
Chartered Psychologist
www.gwen.ca
