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Psychology for Living...01 August 2004
A Peaceful World Starts With The Children

Our children will be the stewards of our world. What they learn from watching us will guide the way they use themselves in the future. The activities in which they are engaged as children will color their world as adults. If we dream of a world in which all people worked together to create health and harmony for all, and solved issues in a constructive, peaceful and respectful manner—would we not then be preparing them to take their part in such a world?

Would we not put a lot of effort into creating harmonious relations and patterns of behavior in the home? This would require parents to upgrade their programs, learning conflict resolution strategies, not only teaching them to the children, but using them themselves.

We do not like it when children react in anger because they are not getting their way, but is that not what parents often model when they do not get their way—the child will not do what the parent wants, so the parent yells and screams? We have all done this, but if we think about it, the children are just modeling our ‘frustration’ strategy when they become frustrated with us.

We become annoyed when children do not do what we ask the first time. But as our children grew, did we not often ignore their requests because we were ‘busy’? Were there not times when they spoke to us that we did not hear what they said because we were thinking of something else? One of the most important skills we can model for children is to really listen. Respectfully listening and understanding another’s point of view is a prerequisite for peace.

If, in the family, children learn to value the point of view of others, and to work together to find solutions that leave everyone feeling heard and satisfied, they will take these skills out into the world.

Gwen Randall-Young is an author and Chartered Psychologist in private practice. For information about, or to purchase her new book, Growing Into Soul: The Next Step in Human Evolution or other books and tapes go to www.gwen.ca
You may contact Gwen at
gwendall@shaw.ca

Gwen Randall-Young
Chartered Psychologist
www.gwen.ca